Deacon Update, December 2013

DEACON UPDATE

Problems viewing this e-mail? View as Web page (use CTRL+ for larger print)

Things were a little sparse in the primary Sunday school class the weekend after Thanksgiving. Only two little girls were there, one of them a visitor. Elbow-deep in the glitter and glue of the construction paper Advent wreathes they were making, the visiting kindergartner smiled at the other and said, "Wanna make friends?"December 2013

In another congregation, I'm told, a couple had been regularly attending worship as well as the fellowship time that follows, and were dismayed that members of the congregation seemed to only be interested in talking to each other. Finally one Sunday another couple approached them, and a good conversation began. Within a few minutes, though, the couples realized that they were both visitors, neither of which had been welcomed by anyone from the congregation: there was no evidence that anyone there wanted to "make friends."

The second story isn’t at all unusual, and is in fact human nature — we gravitate to those with whom we are most comfortable. But isn't this just the opposite of what Jesus taught us? Are we not to seek out those who themselves are seeking the hope found in the good news of the Gospel story? Certainly when they seek us out the least we can do is welcome them!

Advent is a time when more visitors join our services than any other time of year. In the days of Advent remaining, consider offering the gift of friendship to those visiting your congregation whose faces aren't familiar to you. Think of people in your life who may not do well at "making friends" and invite them to a service. It may be the best gift you can give — to them and to yourself.

"Contribute to the needs of the saints; extend hospitality to strangers." ~~Romans 12:13

Director of Denominational Deacon Ministry
dkline@brethren.org
847-429-4306

Church of the Brethren | 1451 Dundee Avenue, Elgin, Illinois 60120

Forward to a friend | Unsubscribe | Edit profile | Change e-mail address

Deacon Update, November 2013

DEACON UPDATE

Problems viewing this e-mail? View as Web page (use CTRL+ for larger print)

View older issues

Connect to deacon website

Rethinking Hospitality

November 2013

Last week my friend Amy and I met for lunch at a relatively new place in town. It’s the sort of restaurant where you order at the counter then your food is brought to the table (this place is pretty small, so the food is often delivered by the same person who took the order). Amy paid for her sandwich and salad, put the change in her wallet, then held out her hand to the woman behind the counter with these words: "I come here pretty often and I certainly recognize you, but I don’t know your name. I’m Amy." The surprised woman offered her own hand, as well as her name—Lola. When Lola brought our food and came back to check on us periodically, I noticed that Amy used her new friend’s name each time, making it clear that this relationship was one she was taking seriously. I can’t help but think that Lola, too, will remember Amy's name the next time she comes in.

We don't often see the kind of hospitality Amy modeled so well. We expect to receive hospitality in places like restaurants and department stores (and can sometimes be quick to complain when we don't), but how often do we offer it ourselves, especially to the extent that Amy did that day? In our busy-ness, how often do we simply not see the people who serve us, people behind counters, taking our tolls as we travel, handing us a cup of coffee through a drive-up window?

We shall be known by the manner of our living. What does the manner of your living, the way you treat those who serve you, say about you? How might you serve them, as Jesus called us to do?

I have a long way to go to catch up with Amy, let alone Jesus.

"Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing that some have entertained angels without knowing it." ~~Hebrews 13:2

Director of Denominational Deacon Ministry
dkline@brethren.org
847-429-4306

Church of the Brethren | 1451 Dundee Avenue, Elgin, Illinois 60120

October Deacon Update

DEACON UPDATE

Problems viewing this e-mail? View as Web page (use CTRL+ for larger print)

View older issues

Connect to deacon website

Strangers No More

October 2013

I don’t know much about raising chickens, but apparently when adding a new one to the flock it's best to slip her into the coop when the other chickens are asleep. The next day the old hens assume that she's always been there, and the new gal wakes up happy in what, as far as she can tell, is the same nest she’s always slept in.

Admittedly chickens aren’t known for being the sharpest tacks in the box. But there is something about this construct of nature that I find very appealing when I think of new people in our congregations. We humans are a bit more evolved than chickens, so there is a good chance we will notice newcomers (and if we don’t, that’s a whole other conversation…); new folks will almost certainly realize they have come to a new place. But what if, after just a few visits, we find ourselves saying, "Wow. It’s like the Clarks have always been here." And what if, more importantly, the Clarks are saying, "Wow. It’s like we’ve come home."

How do we get there? How might we show hospitality in such a way that new sisters and brothers quickly feel like they’ve always been a part of our church family? How do we show what being Brethren is about? How do we help them discern if being Brethren might just be what they are all about, too?

Hospitality is a calling, a ministry, a critical steppingstone to discipleship. Open not just your doors, but your arms and your hearts to people hungry to hear the good news of Jesus. Welcome them into the nest.

"Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing that some have entertained angels without knowing it." Hebrews 13:2

Director of Denominational Deacon Ministry
dkline@brethren.org
847-429-4306

Church of the Brethren | 1451 Dundee Avenue, Elgin, Illinois 60120

Deacon Update

DEACON UPDATE

Problems viewing this e-mail? View as Web page (use CTRL+ for larger print)

View older issues

Connect to deacon website

Feeders?

September 2013

I just returned from our denomination's National Older Adult (50+) conference (NOAC), at which the collective wisdom was palpable. This year a new banner, "Sages Through the Ages," was introduced, onto which the name of each year's oldest attendee will be added during the NOAC gathering. What a terrific reminder of the importance of this group's lifelong contributions to the life and spirit of the church!

Something else new happened at NOAC this year. In addition to the 800+ "regular" attendees, a group of young adults were present as well. They were there mainly as helpers and workshop leaders, but their collective enthusiasm for the work of the church and love of our denomination was just as obvious and infectious as that of their elders. The interactions between young and old were inspiring, including the challenge given to the older attendees to encourage the youth in their congregations, their families, their communities, to attend the NOAC "feeder conference", also known as NYC (National Youth Conference).

Not surprisingly, a number of people at NOAC are deacons, and I thoroughly enjoyed seeing so many folks I’ve met during a workshop. With the young adult presence I couldn’t help but wonder what would happen if our deacon bodies developed "feeders" for our ministry, mentoring and encouraging younger people in the ministry of pastoral care. What would that look like?

We might start by simply looking around. Who are the young (or middle-age) adults in your faith community you could see as deacons? Take a minute to mention to them that you see gifts that would lend themselves nicely to deacon ministry. Plant the seed. Help them understand what deacon ministry is all about in your faith community. Help them understand what deacon ministry is not—to dissuade them from thoughts that they might not be "good enough" to be a deacon. Talk to your deacon sisters and brothers about inviting others to retreats or training events so they might begin to consider a call to caregiving.

Isn't this what discipleship is all about?

"…so that everyone who belongs to God may be proficient, equipped for every good work." —2 Timothy 3:17

Director of Denominational Deacon Ministry
dkline@brethren.org
847-429-4306

Deacon Update, August, 2013

DEACON UPDATE Problems viewing this e-mail? View as Web page (use CTRL+ for larger print) View older issues Connect to deacon website The Do-Over August 2013 You may remember the movie Regarding Henry, the story of a cold-hearted lawyer who is shot during a robbery and literally has to relearn how to live—how to walk, talk, read, and even think. His law firm invites him to come back to work, and one of the first things Henry does is re-read the last case he won, only to learn that he knowingly withheld evidence, allowing a negligent hospital to triumph over a still-suffering patient. His transformed sense of right and wrong won't allow him to live with this, so he takes the hidden piece of evidence to the wronged family, instructing them to show it to their attorney. When they ask why he's doing this, Henry simply smiles and says, "I’ve changed." How many times have you wished for this kind of do-over? Times when, as a caregiver, you didn’t say the right thing, didn’t do the right thing, or perhaps just didn’t say or do anything. In spite of good intentions, we all miss opportunities to send a card, make a call, hold a hand—to simply be present. Many of us wish that we, like Henry, might change (although hopefully without the infliction of a bullet wound). Jesus offers us the gift of transformation every day; truly, every moment of every day we have a chance for do-overs, chances to make amends, to get better at doing the right thing the first time around. Today, right now, think about one of those things you’ve been meaning to do, something that might help another feel Jesus' comfort and peace, and just do it. Think about someone you have wronged and apologize. Hang onto that moment of transformation, and make it your new normal. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern what is the will of God—what is good and acceptable and perfect. —Romans 12:2 Director of Denominational Deacon Ministry dkline@brethren.org 847-429-4306 Church of the Brethren | 1451 Dundee Avenue, Elgin, Illinois 60120

Deacon Update, 2013

DEACON UPDATE

Problems viewing this e-mail? View as Web page (use CTRL+ for larger print)

View older issues

Connect to deacon website

Renewal

June 2013

Those of you planning to attend Annual Conference in Charlotte are likely aware that Sunday has been set aside as a day for spiritual renewal, a day of sabbath, if you will, from business and insight sessions and the usual busy-ness that defines many of the hours of Conference. I think this is a terrific idea.

Caregivers of all kinds are continually reminded to take care of themselves, and we often hear the analogy 'put on your own oxygen mask first' in this context. Deacons and pastors in their caregiving roles would do well to remember this, too, although perhaps in a slightly different way.

While we do need to be diligent about physical care, in our work as ministers self-care takes on a second meaning. As ministers it is just as important that we care for ourselves spiritually, to ensure that the Spirit might continue to be heard and felt through us, through our caregiving.

And that's one way we might look at this day of spiritual growth at Annual Conference, a time to be quiet and let the Spirit speak. A time to remember that our collective joy and trust in the gifts of the Spirit are some of the reasons we continue to come together.

Whether or not you will be at Conference this year, consider taking this idea of a time of spiritual renewal to your deacon ministry, perhaps in the form of a retreat. Find ways to take a sabbath for the sake of yourselves, of your souls; for the sake of those to whom you minister.

"... and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds..." Ephesians 4:23

Don't miss your chance to participate in deacon pre-conference workshops in person or online!

Director of Denominational Deacon Ministry
dkline@brethren.org
847-429-4306

Church of the Brethren | 1451 Dundee Avenue, Elgin, Illinois 60120

Deacon Update, May 30, 2013

DEACON UPDATE

Problems viewing this e-mail? View as Web page (use CTRL+ for larger print)

View older issues

Connect to deacon website

Special Edition: Pre-Conference workshops

As we move toward Annual Conference, remember to register for the pre-conference workshops (Saturday, June 29), designed for deacons and other caregivers. To attend in person, register online (and pay by credit card), or print the paper form (PDF) and mail it in with your check. CEUs are available through the Brethren Academy.

Not going to Conference this year? We are also pleased to announce that these sessions will be offered via live webcast! Please note that the times listed below are eastern time. Registration is not required, but viewing the live sessions is limited to the first 95 online participants. There is no registration fee to view the live webcast; however, a donation to cover program and webcasting costs would be greatly appreciated.

CEUs will be available for those participating in the live sessions; instructions will be provided at the end of each session. CEUs are not offered for viewing the recorded sessions after the fact.

Listen and Play: Ministry with Children in Times of Stress

9:00am - 12:00pm

To a child, a disaster may not be limited to a flood or tornado, but may take a more personal form: the loss of a grandparent, parents divorcing, starting at a new school. Although children are playing and seem oblivious to the distress around them, they are deeply impacted and need a special kind of attention to help them process these experiences. Leaders from Children’s Disaster Services and the deacon ministry will show how, through play, children can gain an understanding of what is happening at a level they can understand. Participants will learn how play and a listening ear can help children process their experiences. We will share, too, about the possibilities for your deacon ministry in caring for the children and youth of your congregation in all aspects of their lives, not just in times of crisis.

Conflict Transformation

1:30 - 4:30pm

Many conflicts can be transformed simply by being present and encouraging active forbearance. In fact, some highly conflicted situations benefit more from a ministry of presence than from problem-solving or mediation—at least initially. As deacons, how can we cultivate mature Christian behavior—to help our sisters and brothers respond faithfully to conflicts that aren’t ready to be resolved? How do we allow space for venting without becoming a gossip-fest? Based on training provided to the Annual Conference Ministers of Reconciliation Team, this workshop will explore how to enter into high-anxiety, escalated conflict situations. Designed for deacons and others who already have a good understanding of conflict transformation, prior training or experience.

Director of Denominational Deacon Ministry
dkline@brethren.org
847-429-4306

Church of the Brethren | 1451 Dundee Avenue, Elgin, Illinois 60120

Forward to a friend | Unsubscribe | Edit profile | Change e-mail address

Deacon Update, May 2013

DEACON UPDATE

Problems viewing this e-mail? View as Web page (use CTRL+ for larger print)

View older issues

Connect to deacon website

Serve One Another

May 2013

A few years ago David was called to be a deacon, in part based on his extraordinary ability to sense when someone was hurting, even if nothing had been verbalized. When this and his other gifts were lifted up and resulted in a call to deacon ministry David was thrilled, and he accepted with grace and humility.

Emma has been a part of the congregation since junior high. She has always appreciated hearing the varied voices of worship leaders as they stand and serve each week, leading prayer, reading scripture, and encouraging sharing as a faith community. But Emma never really saw herself serving in that way, so when the pastor asked if she would be worship leader a week from Sunday it was quite a surprise. With a little encouragement she suddenly realized that yes, this was in fact something she wanted to do and, with a few recent changes in the church, she could do.

These stories might not seem all that unusual, unless you know that David is an adult with autism spectrum disorder, and that Emily has been in a wheelchair since 5th grade. These are terrific examples of how people in our congregations who are differently-abled might be asked to serve, rather than our focus always being on how we might serve them. While service to others, regardless of their abilities, is critical in our roles as caregivers, sometimes the very best way we can serve is to help others find ways to share their own gifts.

How are those with differing abilities encouraged to serve in your congregation? Perhaps physical barriers have been removed, opening a way for people who can’t climb the steps to the chancel to provide leadership during worship. Perhaps you have created opportunities for the gifts of others to be used in ways you—and they—never imagined. What are your stories?

Consider sharing those stories by nominating a congregation or district (including your own!) for the Open Roof Award, presented each year at Annual Conference. This award recognizes congregations or districts that are working "to ensure that all may worship, serve, be served, learn and grow in the presence of God as valued members of the Christian community." Nomination deadline: June 1.

"Like good stewards of the manifold grace of God, serve one another with whatever gift each of you has received." -- 1Peter 4:10

Director of Denominational Deacon Ministry
dkline@brethren.org
847-429-4306